So I'm awake and thinking, (As I always am at 3am) I'm so happy that Oliver is safe now. So much stress off my shoulders. I can't handle for him to go again. it hurt so bad to have him gone. I was reading this old blog, from when I first came back home before he left. I felt so suffocated just remembering how it feels to have him there or to have him so far away.THURSDAY: Aug. 26th, 2004

He is still far away from me right now, but it's easier. It makes me smile to know that he isn't in a combat zone anymore. When I sleep now I am so much more at ease. My dreams aren't terrible like when he was gone. I wake up now and I don't feel so dead anymore. Don't get me wrong, it's still hard to not be around him. but he is safe now, that makes it easier for me to go on with my life.

He is going home to Rhode Island tonight (as in Friday night). Soon I'll know if, or when, I get to see him while he's on leave.
***Crossing my fingers and praying for the best.***