I'm not crazy I'm just a little un-well, I know right now you can't tell. Just stay a while and maybe then you'll see...a different side of me...
So I don't know if it means anything but I talked to Houston last night. He called my phone and was like "did you call?" and I say "yeah a few people from my class are hanging out..." and proceed to invite him. Then he asks if I sent him a text message. I say 'no, just the one last week about thanks for the gas' and he says "oh, someone sent me one saying 'I'll call you tomorrow' " I laugh, "No, it wasn't me" I say, then proceed to say "But I will if you want" and he chuckes and says "right on"
Today I'm doing a 24 hour shift. Shibby!
Today I feel like it won't be long...I swear I can feel it coming.
Thursday, October 09, 2003
Tuesday, October 07, 2003
And I don't want the World to see me, Cause I don't think that they'd understand...When everythings made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am...
There is a guy that I like...but I think if I ever had a chance with him I blew it big time on saturday night. His name is Houston *sigh* yeah, I'm sure I fucked it up. A bunch of us were meeting at my house so we could all go to a party. and I started drinking as soon as I got home from class (at 630pm) people we're meeting at my house at 845pm...so Ron and I are drinking and I'm trying to keep up to Ron. Then Houston gets to my house and I (wanna show off) so I bust out the Jose Cuervo and start doing shots...by 9pm I've had 6 beers and 5 shots. Then we go to the party. I have one more beer on the way and then we get there. I have a corona at the party and end up falling ( I swear I was pushed) into the pool. Freeze my Ass off! and then BLANK I remember waking up with my head in a trash can and I remember laying in the back of a big car (I thought it was a truck but it was a Suburban) Then I remember waking up in my bathroom at home.
I haven't had a Hangover since I was a junior in high school...that was almost 5 years ago (cause it was New Years Eve my junior year)
So yeah, I think IF I ever did have a chance with Houston, I don't anymore. Shitty feeling cuz he's a freakin awesome guy.
We talked about stress in class last night. Firefighter is rated the #3 most stressful job in the US (#1 being President and #2 the CEO of a large Company) I can see how too...I heard a great analogy for it last night.
"it's like every shift you are there walking around with your basket and all day long you pick up rocks and put them in this basket then at the end of your shift you dump the rocks out of your basket and take the basket home. Well one day you go to dump out your basket and one of those rocks doesn't come out so you take it home with you. And this keeps happening until you get to the one day where you go to dump out the basket and none of the rocks come out."
My life has a lot of stress lately...and my rocks are building up, soon enough its gonna start hurting me.
I have a black eye - I haven't had one since I was 7- I don't know where it came from either...
There is a guy that I like...but I think if I ever had a chance with him I blew it big time on saturday night. His name is Houston *sigh* yeah, I'm sure I fucked it up. A bunch of us were meeting at my house so we could all go to a party. and I started drinking as soon as I got home from class (at 630pm) people we're meeting at my house at 845pm...so Ron and I are drinking and I'm trying to keep up to Ron. Then Houston gets to my house and I (wanna show off) so I bust out the Jose Cuervo and start doing shots...by 9pm I've had 6 beers and 5 shots. Then we go to the party. I have one more beer on the way and then we get there. I have a corona at the party and end up falling ( I swear I was pushed) into the pool. Freeze my Ass off! and then BLANK I remember waking up with my head in a trash can and I remember laying in the back of a big car (I thought it was a truck but it was a Suburban) Then I remember waking up in my bathroom at home.
I haven't had a Hangover since I was a junior in high school...that was almost 5 years ago (cause it was New Years Eve my junior year)
So yeah, I think IF I ever did have a chance with Houston, I don't anymore. Shitty feeling cuz he's a freakin awesome guy.
We talked about stress in class last night. Firefighter is rated the #3 most stressful job in the US (#1 being President and #2 the CEO of a large Company) I can see how too...I heard a great analogy for it last night.
"it's like every shift you are there walking around with your basket and all day long you pick up rocks and put them in this basket then at the end of your shift you dump the rocks out of your basket and take the basket home. Well one day you go to dump out your basket and one of those rocks doesn't come out so you take it home with you. And this keeps happening until you get to the one day where you go to dump out the basket and none of the rocks come out."
My life has a lot of stress lately...and my rocks are building up, soon enough its gonna start hurting me.
I have a black eye - I haven't had one since I was 7- I don't know where it came from either...